Would ya put a sock in it?

Now you can politely or otherwise tell me to shut my cakehole here but since wearing an odd sock and a pair of old laddered stockings in my hair I have been most satisfied with my second day hair, which has historically been cause of frequent lament and distain.

I came about the idea after a failed YouTube tutorial of using a sock to curl my hair overnight while I slept which to be honest was an epic fail. (I blame thinness, frizz, texture and lacking in any sort of volume for that)

Like some of the world's greatest discoveries (heart patients & viagra??) mine was accidental.

And so the sock curl became the sock bun.

Now if you have long flowing locks in abundance or you rock a sassy short crop, you may want to stop reading now, go off and spoil it and treat it to a conditioning mask and and tell it you truely love it and you're sorry if you have ever taken it for granted as you know others are far less fortunate than you.

If you have thin, uninspiring, un-cooperative hair that looks a little like this excuse of a fart of a bun read on....

Pathetic. Like those awful donut holes Domino's used to market to stoners as part of their meal for one deal.

Why would anyone want to be a donut hole when they could be a whopping great big 1,000 calorie donut?

Now you've seen my little winky in the flesh you can truly understand the joy my sock bun brings


And here we are, from zero to hero, AA to DD!

Significant eh? Heaving almost?

So you say big deal you can buy donutty things for that....

Well I've tried those and they are either too big for my poor thin hair and/or they are bristley which makes it very difficult to disguise the donut underneath as the hair sticks to it sparsely and doesn't cover it all. I can make them work but with two mirrors, lots of time, pins, sore arms & patience. I also think they look a bit too big and unnatural on me for a boring old day at the office.

My sock bun however  is gym, shower, go or crap, woke up late, shower, make-up, go. A 30 second, never-fail, wearable effort.

So if you fancy a bit of a boost and padded support to your bun cleavage here's how;

Step 1

Take an old sock of any description and a pair of stockings similar to your hair tone as this is what will be hiding just under your hair. This was a loved Primark sock that fell victim to the sock monster and had been living a solitary existing since the bereavement of his better half.

The stockings were most likely laddered within 30 seconds of being worn. One of the thousand's of reasons I loathe stockings. Anyway snip the toe end off the sock and the gusset end and toe end off one stocking leg. You now have two tubes to work with

Step 2

Roll the sock up on itself to create this cute little stripy cotton donut that looks like something straight off the set of Little Big Planet



Step 3

Thread the stocking through the sock donut hole and pull the end 95% through.



Step 4

Fold the 5% stocking end down over the donut then roll the now stocking covered donut back on itself down the whole 95% to the end of the stocking. Weeeeeeeeeee



Step 5

Marvel at how your roll looks like a Chinese money bag dim sim and try not to get distracted at the thought of Yum Cha............ tuck the ends of the stocking back down into the donut hole to hide

Step 6

Stand back and applaud yourself for being such a crafty beggar, then resist the temptation to sprinkle your handsome donut with sugar and cinnamon and dunk into a mug of tea because you are starving due to your Yum Cha day-dreaming. Focus, get back to work and lob your hair up into a high, low or side pony depending on your mood and look de jour.


Step 7

Thread your pony tail through the donut until the donut is resting against your head


Step 8

Flatten and splay the tail out from the central base of the pony tail across the bun. Ensure the bun is mostly covered. You can generally do this by feel without looking even if you are a total un-co like me. Handy!

Now lift the base of the donut slightly away from your head as you coil the loose ends around and under the underside of the donut. I actually think this will hold reasonably well but I've never tested it to see if it does. Instead I whack a few fringe pins in higgledy piggledy around the base of the donut trying to include the hair thats flat against my head, the pony tail ends and also piercing the donut with the pin. Three or four pins usually does it and will hold things secure for me for the whole day and/or night. I like to rough things up and get some strategic flyaways too.

Step 9 (optional)
Skip down the street in your highest, fanciest shoes trying to hail a cab while you strut so you can go over to your friend's apartment in some tragic but fabulous all the same overdressed outfit and talk incessantly about your menial problems, completely disregarding theirs.

So have ya ever put a sock in it?

Whats your favourite go to second day hair look?

Have you ever played Little Big Planet. My sack girl is the cutest thing I've ever seen!

Would you be bessie mates or a total frenemy of Ms Bradshaw in real life?

Entered Me, my best and I's Nifty Fifty Gifty Giveaway yet??
It's a prize coveted more than those Manolo Blahnik Mary-Janes in the Vogue's Accesories closet
Get amongst it before 15th June

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